4 Male Boudoir Photographers Who Understand Sensuality and Intimacy

Men get a bad rap and I don’t like it.

Just the other day one friend shared a horrible message she received from one man via an online dating site with us on facebook. One person wrote in response to the post, Men will become obsolete as partners…we just need them for fixing stuff.”

AAAHHHH!!!!

I immediately wrote back, Men will NEVER become obsolete. I NEVER want that. I just want the dumb f*cks to become obsolete. Big difference.”

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Now mind you, I’m sure the person wrote the comment in jest. But conversations like this keep happening. A few months ago in a private facebook group, the following comment was written,“…..I think that there are probably plenty of woman that would feel more comfortable being shot by a female – especially if they are looking for a more intimate/sensual experience.”

That comment was regarding whether women would rather have a man or woman photograph or film them for boudoir and/or pole dance projects.  I was taken aback. It seemed like the comment inferred that women photographers could give a client a more intimate and sensual experience. What was being inferred about men?

I understand that for your own very personal reasonyou may prefer one gender over another as it relates to a profession or service, however it is a PERSONAL comfort issue.

I do not believe it is fair or true or helpful to the world at large to imply that if someone is looking for an intimate or sensual boudoir photography experience, they would have to work with a woman. Women AND MEN are capable of producing such art.

Therefore, today, I want to share with you 4 Male Boudoir Photographers…whose work I personally love

Here are a couple of my favorite male photographers who understand sensuality, intimacy and the everyday radiant beauty of a woman.

1. J. Quazi King | Quazimotto.On.Wax

"male portrait photographers" - bodybinds.com

J. Quazi King is a Brooklyn based fashion and lifestyle photographer and artist. What I love about his work is that even though it is clear when I’m looking at a “Quazi” photo because he has a “style”,  each portrait is still unique to the personality of the subject. I also love the ways he plays with colors as well as the gorgeous way he masters his black and white images.

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2. Craig Lamere

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Craig is a professional portrait photographer from Pocatello, Idaho. His photography mission? “Show my clients a great time and create the absolute highest quality art they will love.” When describing his work, he uses the following words: Glamour, Boudoir,  & Fashion. I love Craig’s work because it is absolute stunning. He understands lighting in a way that blows my mind. He has a way of making every client or friend that he shoots into a stunning bombshells.

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3. Kasheem Daniels

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As a photographer based in New York City, Kasheem educes inspiration from intimate relationships and the reassuring place of familiarity. Presented as photo stories, his work composes the essence of cinematography, exploring human notions of romance and lovelorn circumstances. <– That’s what his website says. What I know for looking at his work and having been photographed by him is that he understands the beauty and nuances in woman and he is able to capture it in a way that is open, radiant and breathtaking.

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 4. Saddi Khali 

"Saddi Khali" - bodybinds.com

Self-proclaimed “Photo-vangelist”, Saddi “sees u as u were created, in the image of GOD!” Saddi’s work is simple yet profound. He captures his stunning works of art right where you are. For instance, he has a facebook album called, “For the Women Who Think You Have To Lose 20 Lbs First,” to show you that who you are right now is enough and gorgeous and he is able to capture that moment for you to see to. And its beautiful.

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I understand we all may have different ideas about what is “sensual” or “intimate” portraiture. I also understand that we all have different comfort levels with each gender. But what I know is women AND MEN are phenomenal. And I know that if I want to experience a boudoir photoshoot, I can work with a woman or a man and get the exact feeling and vibe that I am going for while being in a safe, professional, sacred space.

I don’t ever want men to be obsolete, as the one lady suggested. And I don’t ever want the world to be comprised of ONLY women boudoir photographers…myself being one of them. And I simply can not agree that men…in general…don’t understand sensuality or intimacy. That is a fallacy and I rebuke it….respectfully.

Who is your favorite male boudoir photographer?

Sheena LaShay is a Wild Magical Woman, Boudoir Photographer, Videographer, and most importantly a Pole Dancer. She writes for SheenaLaShay.com, Owning Pink, Verizon Wireless and is the Co-President & Editor-in-Chief of the #PDBloggersSheena is also the Editor of the Bodybinds blog!

Classy Cursing or How to Talk Like A Potty-Mouth and Still Be a Prima Donna


Don’t curse like a sailor. Curse like a lady.

I’ve seen a lot of pictures on Facebook (mostly someecards-type memes) shared from a Facebook community called Intelligent, classy, well-educated women who say F*ck a lot. That page has, at the time of this writing, 424,690 likes, which says to me that 424,690 women like to think of themselves as intelligent, classy, well-educated cursers. Which has quite a ring to it, but it begs the question: what exactly does it mean to be classy and cussing at the same time?

The image that comes to mind is of a woman in a gown and an up-do holding a cigarette holder and speaking with an anglo-esque accent that you can’t quite place but you just know she’s going to say “droll.” But considering that most of us don’t often wear gowns and smoke from cigarette holders (or say “droll”), what does classy cursing look like? It’s a balance that I suspect few among those 424,690 people have managed to strike.

I’m not always the classiest motherfucker around, but I have some upscale qualities (I sing opera, I speak French, I occasionally drink wine that doesn’t come from a box). Let’s just say I “clean up nice.” And if I hadn’t thought to mention it yet, sometimes I use profanity.

So here are my thoughts on how to talk like a potty-mouth while remaining a prima donna.

 

1. No shouting.

A lady keeps her cool. (Yes, you can slap a man in the face with a satin-gloved hand, but only if you don’t bat an eyelash and only if he’s a cad.) Vulgarity is for adjectives, verbs, and the occasional noun. It’s not for exclamations or imperatives. If you’re upset, don’t yell “SHIT!!!!” Just say reflectively, “Oh. Shit.”

2. Don’t swear at people.

That’s rude and unkind. Classy cursing adds color, not insult, to conversation.

3. Swear in complete sentences.

Intelligent, well-educated people form complex verbal structures. This isn’t a reality TV show—you should be swearing at a 10th grade level at minimum.

4. Surround your four-letter words with longer ones.

I’m especially fond of anything French-tinged. Which sounds better: “Where’s the fucking bellboy with my suitcase?” or “Where’s the fucking concierge with my valise?”

5. Enunciate.

Don’t get all Foghorn Leghorn with your rootin’-tootin’ cock-suckin’ vulgarities. Finish your words. Vulgarity should be cock-suckING.

6. Know your audience.

A lot of what we think of as “classy” comes down to etiquette, which is all a matter of making people feel comfortable. If someone looks taken aback by your language, try to judge if they’re startled because it’s out of context (who would expect trash talk from such an intelligent, well-educated, classy bitch?) or because they’re offended. If it’s the latter, either tone it down or find someone else to talk to.

The above advice applies strictly to using profanity while trying to maintain a typically “classy” image. Really, you can swear however you want to. Want a mouth like a metalhead? Rock the fuck on. Wanna talk like a townie in a dive sports bar? Go Red Sox, ya cunts. Want to not swear at all? Well you go ahead, gosh darn it! But I kind of like the image of the classy curser. I love comedy, and the reaction you can get from the unexpected combination is hilarious. I mean, it’s fucking droll.

Pippi Parnasse is a poler, #PDBloggers member and writer in the Boston area. She has over 10 years of experience both in pole and in writing professionally.

Rediscovering Your Awesomeness

 

In my mind, I am Xena, warrior princess. I am powerful, fearless, and sexy as hell … BUT every so often a crack appears in that perfected tailored armor and I am overcome with self-doubt. In those moments confidence feels like a distant memory and finding my awesomeness is near impossible. Our culture demands perfection from women and it is nearly impossible to not be left with feelings of inadequacy once in awhile. However, like any warrior princess I’ve got weapons to slash that negativity and conquer those fears. First on your journey back to awesomeness is acknowledging that something went wrong. Whatever it was, big or small – a stumbling block in your career path or a crappy self image day – recognize that even if you usually feel fearless, you are still human and vulnerability is part of the deal. Pretending that perfection exists doesn’t help anyone. Now my trick to rediscovering awesomeness is remembering it existed all along – TWIST! Ask yourself these questions. Answer quickly and honestly. Write them down for future reflection.

What is one skill are you really good at?

Is it calligraphy? Solving complicated math equations? Being an amazing friend? Writing deeply involved Harry Potter fan fiction? What do you do better than anyone else? You’ve got skills and its important to recognize that you are accomplished. Start by remembering what makes you uniquely YOU!

What would your friends or family say is your best quality?

In high school I once had the smartest kid in the class stare in awe at the doodles I’d draw on my book covers. To me they were just silly little flowers, but to him I was creating works of art that he didn’t know the first thing about accomplishing. Sometimes you are just too close to your subject and you need to get the perspective of someone with some distance. How many times have you had a friend complain about not being good enough only to stop mid sentence and tell them how crazy awesome they are? Well, do your friends work for them and tell yourself exactly what they would say to you.

My 3 favorite physical attributes are …

Think fast with this one! The reason for put three attributes instead of just one is because I don’t want you wimping out with a “friendly smile” and moving on from there. I want you to write down your luscious hips, your bountiful breasts, your fierce cheekbones, and juicy booty . Your body is one-of-a-kind, celebrate all it’s curves, textures, and beauty. Don’t be shy and don’t be modest!

What inspires you about your hero?

No one ever ascended to greatness without being knocked down several times on their journey. Take inspiration from the struggles of your personal hero and find strength in their ability to overcome to achieve their goals. If they did it, so can you! Take it a step further and think about what tools can you take from their experience?  Now realize you are on the way the to becoming your own hero and you are just at one of the hurdles in your journey.

Who relies on you and why?

Again, don’t waste time with modesty when answering this question. For this person/group/pet you are “awesomeness” personified. You bring something to the table that someone else finds incredibly valuable. Maybe its your boss, your neighbor, or a friend, but they chose you to rely on over someone else. Remember for all your self doubt there is someone out there knows your value, don’t forget that!

What would your younger self be impressed with?

Look back at who you were 10, 15, 20 years ago. What would your younger self find awesome about you and your life? Your stellar shoe collection, that you oversee 20 employees,  you traveled through Europe, or you finally got breasts. Maybe you aren’t were you though you would be, but I bet you have done things your younger self couldn’t even imagine. Look at yourself through the wonder of child’s eyes and remember how far you have come!

***

Why is it so important to rediscover your awesomeness when your ego takes a hit? Because you should not only love yourself, but be in love with yourself. No life is fully lived if you spend it feeling like a failure. You may have taken a hit in life, but my wish is that you can look back on your answers and realize that you were awesome all along.

Need some instant gratification? Try out my favorite tips to feel awesome all over!

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Share your awesomeness with us! Post answers to any or all of the questions below.

 Jillian is an avid pole dance student, accessories and costume designer, rhinestone aficionado, and a PDBloggers Executive Committee Member. She also writes at PoleGeek.blogspot.com.